Saturday, June 30, 2012
McCarthy’s son is now 10-years-old and probably on the internet; I know I wouldn’t want to see my mom’s nude pictures online (then again my mom didn’t look like Jenny McCarthy) I’m not a prude but since McCarthy’s already taken off her clothes 6 times for jerk rag, can’t she just let her ego go because she has a young, and autistic son?
When asked if she minded that her son would find her in nothing but high heels and a smile, McCarthy replied with the confidence of a 92-year-old Madame. “I think he can find a lot worse available on the Internet these days.” Adding in an interview with People magazine, “‘they’re really elegant. It's probably a lot more sophisticated than a lot of the stuff you'd see of people with their clothes on.” Keep telling yourself that sweetheart.
Why would McCarthy take a step back after doing more legit work these days; vanity; money; attention; all likely possibilities. I think some people should pose nude, why the hell not, but a lot of people don’t have young autistic children to protect, and let’s be honest the cover is ugly and looks like a 1990’s X-Rated video cover, Elegant? Try trashy.
Months later McCarthy’s images will be soiled and forgotten, her 10-year-olds mental health? Not easily forgotten.
Friday, June 22, 2012
The Doctor is in, and let’s get this over with quick because I have a hangover. Some people need a therapist for logical mental reasons, others need a good kick in the knickers with some tough love; so here it is; your problems solved in minutes, not hours and you didn’t cough up the $150 bucks an hour for a psychologist (who’s probably nuttier than you) or even spend you’re morning on the toilet from all the medication they’d prescribe. You’re welcome, now shut up and learn.
-You Don’t Care What People Think: I think you’re ugly.
-You Hate Your Parents: Grow up and forgive them, or don’t talk to them anymore.
-Cupcakes: These are really round slices of cake; sorry chubs.
-Boot Camp: You’re just paying an angry guy to yell at you; get married and it will be for free.
-Proceco: Is really sparkling white wine, plus $10 dollars.
-You Can’t Get A Man: So stop whining about it; shave your legs; get a new hair color and work it.
-Why Is Everyone Crazy: Because everyone is a little wacko; if you don’t think you are, oh boy you’re in trouble.
-People Are Out To Get You: Sometimes, but that’s life. Watch a few seasons of “Dallas” and learn.
-“Green Lantern,” Movie: Really did suck; No REALLY.
-You’re Obese And Want ONLY A Muscle Guy: Drop the lard or win the Lottery.
-Space Wipes: Are really sponges, and not worth 19.99 + shipping.
-You’re A Drunk And Druggie: Google a picture of Lindsay Lohan 2011; and remember she’s 24-years-old!
-You’re Depressed: Because of you’re missing a leg; arm; eye? Right; feel better, bitch.
-You Have Bad Self Image: No matter how much surgery you get, you’ll feel the same; just prettier.
|John Francis Daley plays Dr. Sweets on "Bones," and those lips sure are sweet.|
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Listen when I was 16 I would have loved to get hit on by a hot teacher; shoot I would have loved to be hit on by anyone remotely attractive, but in my day you didn’t want to smell the teachers, let alone have sex with them. These days teachers are getting busted for teaching student’s the three A’s; ass; alcohol and Al’s discount motel.
Some people have more of a problem when it’s an older male teacher, and female student compared to young male student/older female teacher. I think it’s wrong either way. I’m not naïve and realize hormones run rampant in life; sometimes more so for different people, but when you decide to be a teacher, one of your jobs is to protect your kids, not bed them. Temptation is a human trait that many of us share with the animal kingdom; what sets us apart from being animals is when we have the sense to know right from wrong.
It seems every week a teacher gets caught banging one of their students, and that’s just the ones who got caught. There are younger teachers more than ever due to budget cuts, making older teachers retire early.
In the US today, the fastest growing population of people contacting HIV are young people, between the ages of 13-24-years-old, according to The Center For Disease Control. A close second, according to a study published by World Health Organization, finds sexually active people over the age of 50-years-old being infected with HIV more than ever (oh no, Grandma has AIDS) You have to ask yourself if teens are getting it from teachers, or giving it to teachers?
It seems to me, like most institutions when it comes to children being molested, The Board Of Education needs a facelift; like the Catholic Church and Hasidic community, who punish the victims, but hide and promote the guilty. The Board Of Education needs an overhaul before people have a hard time distinguishing who’s the child, and who’s the adult.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Burger King in a desperate attempt to get the number one spot from McDonalds put out a new menu on June 13th, besides artery clogging new sandwiches, Burger King introducues it's new bacon ice cream sundae; as if your ass wasn't fat enough; who's Burger Kings new chef, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie?
Burger King’s bacon sundae has 510 calories, 18 grams of fat and 61 grams of sugar; Enjoy it while it and YOU last.
|NJ Governor Christie meets President Obama; admits to liking donuts.|
We all got lazy, instead of making our own pancakes (flour, oil, egg, milk, baking soda) we buy processed boxed crap because it’s easier, and that Black woman on the box has a friendly smile. Our generation has grown up with processed food; that our bodies don’t know how to digest; therefore it stays in the stomach leading to belly fat.
If mighty 5ft 6 Bloomberg has his way (and this is a guy who got a third term as Mayor) one wonders what’s next on the list. Will Donuts be banned and king sized candy bars; will fatties and the public like myself have to go down to Chinatown, find a dealer and be led through secret chambers until a wall of Gucci knockoffs, King sized Snickers bars, and large soda bottles come into view? Just maybe.
|Mayor Michael Bloomberg Enjoys a (small) Coors Light. No word if Richy Pants had 4-5 more.|
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Some people have said that Chelsea Handler screwed her way to the top after dating Ted Harpert, then president of E network for 5 years; well big surprise everyone; that’s how you get anywhere in Hollywood and most jobs elsewhere. 95% of jobs are given in entertainment by either who you know, or who you blow.
Most people think you can only get on TV or the movies by talent alone, oh please; there are more talented actors slinging hamburger’s, then there are in this year’s movies. To make it big in Hollywood it takes connections, and so what if he helped her? Connections can get you in, but talent makes you stay, as in Handlers case since she’s gone on to write 3 bestselling books and host her own nightly talk show since 2007 (she’s the only female to host a successful late night talk show)
Handler is as known for loving vodka as she is loving the many colors of the rainbow when it comes to the opposite sex. My Aunt JoJo would have said she was a cheap tart (of course Aunt JoJo spent most of her time in Church; her husband? A whore house in Trenton NJ) I think she’s just a gal who likes variety; like a box of Entenmann's donuts; there’s chocolate; frosted; crumb and plain; yum I’ll have all four please.
|Dave Salmoni tamed Chelsea for awhile (white) one.|
|Chelsea and Andre Balazs, the Hungarian (tan) one.|
Looking through photos of the men Handler has bedded in the last five years; one would not be shocked to find Handler dating a Neanderthal next.
Handler’s famous box-of-donuts-of-men have been:
|Chelsea Handler with Ted Herbert, the (gray) one.|
(White) Dave Salmoni: animal handler and hot body.
(Black) 50 cent: rapper, actor and business man.
(Tan) Andre Balazs: New York hotel-hotshot-millionaire.
As of this article Handler and Balazs are still playing hide the French cruller-they just jetted off to Rome in April in high style that makes Handler’s former days of eating Ramen noodles for din-din well left forgotten. The danger will be if all this high life will mess up how funny Handler is; her blasé interview style blows me away each time and makes you laugh, especially when the guest are as boring as paste.
Will Handler and Balazs take a walk down the aisle or just a booze filled trip to Cabo Mexico; who knows, with Handler, it will always be fun for her fans to find out what shade of donut she picks next.
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Get Your Possum Stew Ready Y’all, Miley Cyrus, 19, Is Engaged,And Cut Her Hair Like A Lesbian.
Miley Cyrus shocked many last month (well, those easily shocked) with her announcement that she got engaged to “Hunger Games.” bit player Liam Hemsworth; whose brother, “Thor” actor Chris Hemsworth is better well known. Some are even whispering that Cyrus has a baby kangaroo in the oven.
Now the country media whore has taken out her extensions, and cut her hair; which makes her look like a cross between singer Robyn, and the "Leave Britney Alone!" Youtube guy. Some terrible gossips say Hemsworth is happier dating a boy now.
Cyrus is known for her starring role in the laughless TV hit “Hanna Montana,” the song “Party In The USA,” and her preference for smoking bongs and talking funny. Many even consider her a pimple that won’t go away; even after constant popping. Some predict Cyrus will need to get married when her career fades after her fans develop breast.
|She looks like Ellen!|
|So the pants are tacky; she's rich y'all.|
If the Romeo & Juliet of the Hollywood and the backwoods actually get married it remains to be seen. One thing’s for sure; if they don’t Helmsworth better hope his career doesn’t lag, because Wilbur the pig won’t be giving that diamond ring back.
Here's a great tip, not every girl looks great when she cuts her hair short; the wrong cut can even age young tarts like Cyrus. I predict Cyrus will be back to her extensions within a month or two, until then don't be shocked to learn that Hemsworth has asked her to turn the lights off when they make monkey love.
Monday, June 4, 2012
Joe Manganiello is known to make hearts melt on HBO's "True Blood." as a sexy werewolf; Now he's giving female and gay fans even more of his sexy 6'5 (!) self in the upcoming film "Magic Mike" which Stars a who's who of hot ass men.
There's a dude for everyone's taste in "Magic Mike," which takes place in a male strip club. Even picky, saintly Aunt Ida would surely put in her dentures to see Maganiello; Channing Tatum ; Alex Pettyfer; Matt Bomer or Matthew McConaughey show what the good lord gave'em, and the devil added.
Manganiello made an impression last might at the MTV Movie Awards, dressed as his character in "Magic Mike." Manganiello came on stage dressed as a fireman, complete with no shirt, rock abs and a bearded smile that could frost a bowel of Texas Chili.
Get out your dollar bills!
|Joe Manganiello makes me feel bad for those donut's.|
|Joe, Chelsea Handler and Chuy; what a family!|
Check out the Magic Mike trailer here
Drew Barrymore was once a child Star turned teenage alcoholic; not many thought the actress with the lisp would ever be able to grow into adult acting roles, let alone stop the boozing and the using, but she went to rehab and unlike Lindsay Lohan actually worked towards sobriety.
Barrymore went on to grow into adult roles and produce movies with her Flower Films production company, having many hits in the 1990’s, often playing off her lisp in roles perfectly suited for her talents.
Barrymore hasn’t had a hit since 2003’s "Charlie’s Angels", and besides a role in HBO’s "Grey Gardens" movie she has appeared in flop-after-flop movies. Barrymore at 37-years-old in a crossroads in her career, one that Meg Ryan had in her forties (being too old to play the wacky lovelorn female)
Barrymore is pregnant with handsome Will Kopelman's baby and married him this weekend in a quickie ceremony. Kopelman an art dealer, wore Chanel as well as Barrymore; im sure it doesn’t hurt that Kopelman’s father is the former CEO of Chanel; Ka-Ching! for Barrymore; screw her career-her husband is a hottie; has some coin and gets free rags from Chanel, my kind of guy.
After a needed rest will Barrymore be able to climb back to the top. I think she can, I doubt it will be in movies, but I see her starring in her own TV show and we at hudsontayloryourmind wish her well; just please no nude magazine covers; Demi Moore did it best for Vanity Fair magazine back in the day and everyone who has followed her looks stupid.
|Barrymore won't be wearing cheap stuff like this anymore.|